When everything is blue…

We all go through times in our lives when we feel really frustrated, let down, and sad. It happens to us at work, personal life, sports, friendships and many times, we feel disappointed with ourselves. Some disappointments disrupt our daily routine while others could change our lives. When something or someone fails to meet our set thoughts and ideas, we feel let down, sad or even betrayed.

All disappointments, no matter how big or small, come out of our expectations for how something should have been.

You feel disappointed because you might have recognized that you don’t have, didn’t get or might never get to have whatever it is you wanted.  You had expectations of your life and future and things didn’t turn out the way you had hoped they would.

The extent and severity of the disappointment we feel is determined by the level of emotions we have invested on specific outcomes or people. Love and health disappointments can really challenge and greatly influence our sense of self.

Disappointment comes with a lot of sadness. And what should you do when you feel so sad? Unfortunately, there is no magical cure or easy fix. But there are a few things you can do to speed up your healing process and help you work through these issues more effectively.

There is no easy way out of sadness…

I am afraid you will have to go through the whole process from start to finish and the more you accept that truth the faster you will feel a little bit better.

  • The first thing you should really allow yourself to do is cry. So, go ahead, there is absolutely nothing wrong with crying. Let is all out and cry as much as you need to. 
  • Another thing you should come to terms with, is the fact that right now you are not in a good place and that is normal, it happens to all of us. Feeling hurt, disappointed, betrayed, let down, or sad doesn’t make you weaker. These are all normal human feelings and there is no person on the whole planet who also hasn’t felt this way at some point.
  • If you feel like expressing this frustration and sadness physically, you can do that. Physical activity is a great way to let all this tension out so go walk, run, stay in the middle of a field and scream, kick a wall. Do (safely) what it takes to not allow your emotions to boil inside you.
  • Some people feel reluctant when it comes to confronting the person or situation that made them feel sad and disappointed. Others, though,  feel the need to do so and that probably helps them heal in more ways than one. Try to be mindful of how you express your feelings and frustration – words can really hurt. Do not be afraid of telling the person who made you sad and upset how you feel. You have the right to do so and you should. 
  • Do allow yourself time to ‘mourn’. Many times sadness and disappointment, especially when it comes to health or relationships, feel like grief. There is no easy way out of it, am afraid. Give yourself time to go through all the emotions and embrace them. The more you resist these stages of the sadness process the longer it will take you before you feel better. 
  • When the time feels right, move on. Surround yourself with positive friends and people who love you. If you are lucky enough to have a healthy, loving and encouraging support network take ‘advantage’ of that. People who care about you will never leave you on your own especially when you feel so down. They’ll help you stop dwelling on the negative experience and get up on your feet.
  • There are things you have to do. A whole life ahead of you. Many amazing experiences to still enjoy. Lots of chances to be happy, succeed, travel, achieve, evolve, be a good partner, parent and enjoy yourself and those you love. The faster you heal, the more time you will have to do all these things and more. When its the right time.. let things go and be hopeful for what comes next. 

The only way out is through the pain.

When you feel sad, hurt or disappointed – no reasoning will heal your pain. That’s right. No matter how many pieces of advice and comforting words you get to hear, they won’t be able to give you an immediate relief. Sadness can be a healthy part of life if lessons learned by it make you a stronger person. Am afraid no person on Earth is except from pain, sadness, disappointment and grief. After you give yourself the space and time to go through all the emotions then how you deal with the situation is what really matters. Ask for help if you have to. Stay hopeful. 

Till next time xxx